July 31, 2007 by amanda.stebbins.

I leave in less than a week…at this time next week, I’ll still be stuck on the plane. I’d actually still have about 5 hours to go on the longest plane trip of my life. But needless to say, it’s an exciting thing to look and see Australia and ministry ahead of me. The past two days namely I’ve had the opportunity to talk to two of my closest friends and each of them spoke truth into my life. I am blessed with and by my friends- I love that I will miss them because they are such an integral part of my life, these girls especially. I know that they have my backs in prayer as I do theirs.

I still haven’t packed. I still have about a half a page’s worth of stuff to do. And I only have about 5 days to get it all done in (Sunday is Jordan, my 7 yr old cousin’s, baptism!) But I have an enthusiasm and a peace about where I’m at in life and where I’m going. Things are being restored in my life. I’ve been brought to the ultimatum of whether I’m going to continue to put everything else under the sun in higher priority than God or if I will surrender myself completely. And so I choose to surrender, to submit, and to love. I don’t know what the next 6 months hold for me or for my future, but I’m increasingly excited about each detail that is still a mystery.

I hear the voice, the voice of the one I love, calling my name.
He’s saying come up higher to hear the angels sing, come up higher my beloved.
Come up higher, leave this world behind. You will find what you’ve been looking for.
I am running, running after you, you’ve become my soul’s delight;
I am running, running after you, here with you I find my life.

-Christ for the Nations “Running”

Posted in Still in the U.S. | No Comments »

July 18, 2007 by amanda.stebbins.

I’m sitting in College Station at the moment soaking up the fleeting moments of summer. Right about now in three weeks I will be arriving in Australia to be there for six months. And to me, that’s strange. I can’t believe that it’s already here…and I can’t believe I’m going to be gone that long. Life just kinda creeps up on you sometimes I suppose. Anyways, getting to be down in College Station has made me nostalgic for the time in my life when I actually had my own place here, and I’m honestly a bit sad that I won’t be here to enjoy the company of the group of people that I’ve had the opportunity to be around for the past week or so. Plus…Matt’s house is amazing. Just a lot of fun to hang out with people in.

So ultimately this little period of transitions is kinda strange. Transitioning out of the physical lives of my friends and soon to be my family and transitioning into a new kind of family…the 12 other students and 6 leaders I’ll be spending the next six months with. And a song from high school comes to mind… “It’s a bittersweet symphony, that’s life”….not the rest of the song, just that line. Except I’d change it to sweet-bitter. There is a sweetness to having a passion in life, even when that passion draws you away from everything you love except the Lord. There is reminiscing mixed with anticipation and a huge excitement of what is to come mixed with the sober realization of leaving things here. And so God works.

God likes to bring me to change because then I cannot expect anything even close to what actually will come. And the most exciting part is that He will be fulfilling my deepest desires in the midst of it…even though I’m sometimes apprehensive of change. I do look forward to getting off the plane halfway across the world and it be winter in August, but more for the reason that I’m getting an opportunity to go devote myself and my work and everything I do pretty much constantly for six months to God. I love to serve, and I want to learn how to do that and to love better. I want to be known for the way I love people because then people will see God and not me. They might think they see me, but I cannot love to that capacity and that intently if I try to love. It just doesn’t work like that.

I look forward to telling stories and hopefully to hearing stories from you. I want to hear about life…I already anticipate a few love stories, maybe some pseudo adventurous ones, and let’s not forget the dramatic ones Anyways, I’m off to find something to do around here….surely there’s a way to keep yourself entertained while the rest of the world of college students are at work. Later!

Posted in Still in the U.S. | No Comments »

July 7, 2007 by amanda.stebbins.

I suppose I can start writing on this. I leave a month from yesterday for Australia…kinda crazy that it’s already here. Or that it’s here at all. I can hardly believe I’ve already graduated from college, much less be preparing to go overseas for six months. Regardless of the disbelief, I’m excited to no end. I think the most excitement comes from me not having any clue whatsoever about what to expect from this period of my life. This door opened up over the past year, and this is where God has led me. There couldn’t be anything more exciting in life right now, or at all, than being completely clueless as to what God is doing, but trusting Him with my life, with relationships, with circumstances, pretty much with everything.

Over the past month, I’ve learned more and more about the fiercely committed love of God and His incomprehensible faithfulness to those He loves. The next six months of my life are completely covered financially because of friends who believe in what I’m doing and more importantly in what God is and will be doing. I’ve learned a lot about the insecurity I’ve held on to for so long in my life and am in the pruning process right now of getting that out of my life- as a daughter of God, I have no need or reason for insecurity. It’s almost as if I’m awakening from some dull bland-ness of life- I don’t know how better to describe it. The love of God moves me as I see it manifested through people and just through His presentation of it. And I guess the greatest realization is that my life is to be completely about love- loving God and loving others. So that’s where my heart lies.

I cannot honestly tell you that I have any remote expectations apart from being changed over the course of the next six months. I know who I am when I return to the United States will be different than who I am now, and I’m really excited about that. Reading up on my leader’s blog, I’ve begun to grasp a small glimpse of what I will get to do, and yet at the same time I still have no clue what I’m about to do; I just know I’m jumping in head first with no reserves.

According to the aforementioned blog, there’s 13 people so far in my school, ages 17-29. I’ve talked to 4 of them, and I’m excited to meet the rest. Ah…I’m so excited about all of this.

I suppose that’s all I have for now…I’m sure there will be more to write about as August 6th draws closer. Til then, preparations, prayer, and patience (yay for alliteration) shall be consuming my time and mind

Grace and peace-

Amanda

Posted in Still in the U.S. | No Comments »